Never in my Dreams

there was a kitten named Bashang,

who came to us on a rainy morning

she was gentle, and sweet,

and lovable, but a bit smelly

yet with all her vileness

and all her imperfections,

i loved her wholly, unrestrainedly

and for once, i felt my love repaid

i slept through the night imagining

the sweet future with my feline friend,

something to yearn, and caress

and embrace, whenever i'm depressed

it was an unfamiliar feeling,

but soon i realized, 

it was this foreign emotion,

that i have long been searching for

an affection so big,

for a creature so small

i savoured the notion,

of loving without hesitation,

of giving without expectations

it was all new to me, i was scared

yet i was happy, 

because for once,

at last, my love was repaid

and yet as i was falling deeper

into the abyss of all these emotions

on the sea of illusions and fantasies,

she was so quickly taken away, in a snap

vanished like a gentle breeze,

gone from my arms, but never in my dreams

it was as if life is so taut

on letting me feel capable

of loving selflessly, blindly

and to know how it feels,

even for once,

to be loved back.

(11:13 pm, march 11, '14)

***

it was around October 2013  (i think?) when this happened.

months later, i've dreamt of her and that's when i made this.

i can't believe i'm this dramatic. over a cat.

*insert foreveralone meme here*

(note: this is the first time i've willingly written a poem. so yea, it's a bit rusty.)
(*PS: the poem is a bit exaggerated, I actually have a loving family and friends. And I love them back.)